Stopak's death signaled a huge change in things. I had also started worrying that the voice might blame me for causing it in some way. I had made good...use of my time off from the Market, spending most of everyday with Carolyn and her brother and sister. Every morning we'd take the little kids to the playground and let them run themselves completely out of energy. Once we got them back home for their naps, Carolyn and I had at least two hours of quiet and privacy to make love, and cement our. But I needed a job; I couldn’t take girls out on the pittance I got in pocket money. I needed a job!So did most of the school age kids in the town. So there weren’t enough to go round. The only one I was offered was in the bookshop. Kevin got a job in the record store (but then his cousin was the manager). Jiz (Jeremy if you wanted to wind him up) got a job in the petrol station – 9pm to 1am everyday, he was rolling in money, and slept through many lessons. I got the bookshop. Not just any. Luckily, we both had and have the same attitude. We have an open relationship but have no secrets between us. So these pictures are an affirmation of where I was. I have more to where I am now which you may see. Now, I have a question for you. Would you like to document your journey with photography as well as your journal? If you feel uneasy, I understand but if you trust me, I believe you should do this.”“Wow, this is a lot to digest. My question is do you have any regrets with the. . I pay cash for everything." After all these years, you still haven't learned to be modest," he said, sadly. "And to think, I used to have such high hopes for you." Sorry to disappoint," I said, attempting to console him. "If it's any consolation, I don't have much --," Much? Much of what... ? Can't you put together a coherent sentence? And you call yourself a writer..." Darn it, Father Time... , you didn't let me finish my sentence. I was trying to tell you... , they're making me pay cash...".
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